My Horse Prince 12+

This is what life strives to be. This is what everyone strives to be. This is a masterpiece, perfection. People says that nothing can be perfect, but this disproves them. Before getting this game, I was lost. I didn’t know what to do with my life. I was addicted to nicotine and marijuana and had several cancers. I was bored of my life. Nothing ever satisfied me, and the only feeling I felt was pain. I wanted thrill. I wanted happiness. I wanted life. Today, while mindlessly looking through the App Store, I found this game. “Horse Prince.” As soon as I laid my eyes on the majestic being that called himself the horse prince, I knew that this was the solution to all my problems. This Horse, he was my savior, my light. Suddenly, I found my finger on the “get” button. I thought, wait, but I didn’t mean to download the game! I was just mindlessly looking at things! I was glad I downloaded this. This game got me addicted and made me more happier than I ever was in life. The storyline was beautiful, and the art is fantastic. I had fallen in love with the horse prince and would not stop thinking about him in even the most unrelated circumstances. I was so addicted to this game I got rid of my nicotine and marijuana addiction. This was a good addiction, for real, because I felt enlightened. Thank you kind and wise people for creating such a beautiful game. I wish you all the love in the world.

This game is holy beyond any quantifiable level, the love and happiness it has brought me is immeasurable, one day I was just sitting in my recycling bin looking at some worm on a string rule 34 when the idea crossed my mind to type the word “horse” into the App Store. As soon as my crusty eyeballs sniffed the sheer beauty that is this game I fell deeply in love. the sight of the glorious horse man cured my cancer, brought my hamster back from the dead, regrew my left arm and helped my dad finally come home from getting the milk. My hands quivered as I entered my Apple ID password and installed the game for I knew that true love could not escape me any longer. As soon as the app finished installing I broke up with my role blox girlfriend, I had found a new lover. I met with my man beast and we started a new life together, we now have 6.85 deformed children and we have started a flourishing small business that is actually a carrot mafia/cult. Last night the god-like ranch owner who introduced me to my one and only love enters my dreams and commanded I commit arson at Cracker Barrel. Of course I obliged and I have no regrets. This game is better than Jesus Christ himself, this game is true love and true happiness, my life now has meaning, the void of my heart is now full. Download this game now and find your destiny.

I was born a dumb, blind useless child until the horse prince entered my life. My love. My muse. Before this experience, I didn’t have any light or joy in this life. I would wake up everyday knowing that it was lacking a man-horse. I have found my man-horse now and he is not a man, but a prince. His beauty was too great. I started picturing my prince in my life, but I was so devastated that I could not lay my eyes on him, as I was dumb and blind and useless. My family started to hate me, for I only talked about my beloved prince. Oh how I cried that I couldn’t see him. My one wish was to lay my eyes on his long sender neck and his majestic face. He’d gallop around the fields, but my prince would always make sure I always got what I wanted. And through his magical horsie powers, I began to see more and more of his aw-inspiring body and everything else around me. When I first layed my eyes on his face, I started picturing our lives together—all the time we will spend together as we gallop into the wind and as I brush his mane and all of the other hair on his body. I am thankful everyday that I downloaded this app. And if you are looking to cure your blindness through beautiful horse-man than I encourage you to download this game.