Toucan - Relationship Advice 17+

Easy to use and extremely valuable

My partner and I have been using Toucan for a few months now. I’ve found the content to be very helpful and relatable. The videos of real couples sharing their stories about a range of topics make me feel like our experience as a couple isn’t so isolated, and that is super reassuring.

I love being able to take the Pulse regularly to see where my partner and I are really at, and also look back on our stats in the past.

It’s a simple app with profound value. I’d recommend Toucan to every committed couple I know, married or not.

Lots of information but could be more interactive

I am giving it 5 stars because it has an abundance of valuable information all in one place.

This app was not reviewed when I downloaded it on Sunday, October 11, 2020. It is free so I thought, “why not take a chance.”

It has exercises to do separately then you come together and discuss videos and exercises letting you see areas that need more work.

It did not appear to focus solely on sex like some apps do. Further more, it did not appear to push religion although it did mention the love languages which is Christian based.

First you both download the app. Then one of you creates an account and invites the other to do the same. It wasn’t too difficult.

Then we individually took the “Pulse” quiz. When we were both done it merged the answers to see where we need the most help. It gave a synopsis of my answers but did not show me his. I only have a general idea of how he answered based on the changes in the model and summary they provided of our combined answers.

I am not sure if the modules were listed in order by our particular needs or if that is the standard order, but since the pulse tab recommended that we start with communication and it was listed first, we started with it.

I thought the couple interviews were helpful because it showed me that I am not alone in my struggles and my husband referred to things he heard as well when discussed things in “Couple” time.

Personally, I found taking notes with “paper and pen” (Word) helpful. Sometimes there are lists of questions or things to think about in the video portions of the modules. However, there is no place to record answers to the questions for discussion later.

I did not find the exercises to be extremely helpful on their own because there was no place for an explanation of why you feel that way but they did serve some function. There is a communication review that repeats, presumably so you can see if there is progress, yet there aren’t any real substantive exercises so we were going through it so fast that nothing was really changing except for the frustration levels and those were increasing.

I ended up going through each section of each module again, taking thorough notes and creating our own discussions using the questions that were all too briefly touched upon. This seemed to help because we were getting into much more thorough discussions about how we talk to each other, how we feel about things, and why we feel that way about it.

Also, instead of waiting for “Couple Time” to discuss the entire module, we found it easier to watch one video together at a time. Then we use the exercises as a way to “keep us honest,” so to speak, as we can answer separately. It also takes a small bit of the pressure off because no one is answering first.

Finally we go to my notes and answer any additional questions I noted or things that he observed and keep track of everything that we discussed and how we answered things in the exercises noting the date of the discussion. This way we can review it all again later to see if there is any progress.

I don’t mind putting in the extra effort to save our relationship and my husband recognizes and appreciates my investment.

It does start to mention “God” in the Conflict Module. As far as praying together(or by yourself) goes, it is okay as long as you both buy into it, it brings comfort and it is consensual, because it would be an alternative way to communicate with your partner or more importantly with yourself. As long as it isn’t pushed as the “answer” to everything, because I don’t find comfort in it and have issues with religion being pushed like a bad drug. I will, for the time being, continue to give this app a chance.

I don’t know that I would recommend it to others in its current state.

Developer Response ,

Hey HomegrownMIgirl, thanks for giving Toucan Together your great review.

We’re glad that you’re taking time as a couple to look at the Communication Module and having deeper conversations that are helpful for your marriage.

We’re also happy to hear that you’ve found a way of engaging with the content that's helpful to you ...there’s so much great content to explore!

Wondering if you’ve discovered our bookmark and notetaking function - simply tap the star while watching videos. You can access all your bookmarks and notes at any time from the menu bar.

There are spiritual elements offered from time to time e.g. forgiveness and healing of past hurts and we hope that these are helpful options if you wish to engage with them.

We hope that the huge range of content, including a large and variety of bonus material will help you and your husband to grow and strengthen your relationship.

Technical difficulties

I can’t fully access the acc because it won’t allow me to invite my partner.