Chompendium: Eat What Fits
A grid of small judgments
Free · In‑App Purchases · Designed for iPad. Not verified for macOS.
A category is posted. A grid of tiles is dealt. You walk square to square and eat only the
tiles that satisfy the category — and something else is already on the board with you.
Every tile is a small judgment made under pressure, which is what turns knowing something
into learning it.
THREE SUBJECTS, FREE. TWO EXTRAS, ONE PURCHASE.
WORDS, NUMBERS and THE WORLD are the earnest ones, and they are free — all of them, not a
trial. Six boards each. Nouns and verbs, plurals, prefixes, and words that are spelled the
way they sound and words that are not. Counting, halves, multiples, primes and times
tables. Which animals are mammals, which metals rust, which cities are not countries.
Things that are true, checkable, and safe to hand to a child, banded so a first board never
turns into a third one.
THE TRAY is the joke, and the joke is a real ruleset. Eat what is botanically a fruit. Eat
what is technically a sandwich. Eat what is reimbursable. Eat what would hold up. Five
boards where the rule is absurd, posted, and completely consistent — a player who reads the
placard can always be right.
THE CABINET does not stop. Every category, shuffled, accelerating, no syllabus.
One purchase unlocks The Tray and The Cabinet together, once, forever.
HOW IT PLAYS
Drag anywhere on the board to walk and tap to eat, or use the arrow keys. Eat a wrong tile
and you lose a life. The wanderers patrol their own paths and eating is not the only way to
die — they judge nothing, they simply arrive.
Every absurd category states its rule on the placard. The joke is never a coin flip.
BEFORE YOU HAND IT OVER
• Eighteen boards across the three subjects cost nothing and end nowhere. No clock, no
nagging, no trial that expires.
• The Tray and the Cabinet open together for a single payment that is made once. Nothing
recurring, no currency, no second thing to buy later.
• There is no advertising framework compiled into this app.
• Nobody signs in. Nothing is measured about the player, and no link leads anywhere out
of the game.
• Every sound and every note is synthesised on the device rather than streamed, and the
front screen silences either one.
• Boards, lives and records are written to the phone.
• The whole game runs with the aeroplane on. Game Center is the sole exception, and
refusing it costs a leaderboard and nothing else.
The earnest subjects and the absurd extras never mix. A child handed Words, Numbers or The
World will not walk into a joke category by accident.
Privacy policy: https://chompendium.californiadepartmentoflove.com/privacy.html
Ratings & Reviews
- This app hasn’t received enough ratings or reviews to display an overview.
Hold a finger on a word to read it larger. The board waits while you read.
A run you had to leave is still there when you come back, paused where it stopped.
The pause card now has the sound switches.
Boards played with creatures off keep their own best score.
Finishing a subject now counts all six boards, and a purchase approved later opens the extras straight away.
The developer, KYLE AUSTIN PRIESS, indicated that the app’s privacy practices may include handling of data as described below. For more information, see the developer’s privacy policy .
Data Not Collected
The developer does not collect any data from this app.
Accessibility
The developer has not yet indicated which accessibility features this app supports. Learn More
Information
- Seller
- KYLE AUSTIN PRIESS
- Size
- 8.7 MB
- Category
- Word
- Compatibility
Requires iOS 15.0 or later.
- iPhone
Requires iOS 15.0 or later. - iPad
Requires iPadOS 15.0 or later. - iPod touch
Requires iOS 15.0 or later. - Mac
Requires macOS 12.0 or later and a Mac with Apple M1 chip or later. - Apple Vision
Requires visionOS 1.0 or later.
- iPhone
- Languages
- English
- Age Rating
4+
- 4+
- In-App Purchases
Yes
- The Tray and The Cabinet $2.99
- Copyright
- © 2026 Kyle Priess
