I saw this game on the App Store, 3 years ago. My friends were over, having a few beers, looking at the App Store to find some fun games. Udders caught my eye. I saw a game called “Milk the Cow” and decided to give it a shot. This game got me hooked immediately. I couldn’t stop. It was a constant race to get a better, faster score. I was addicted. During work, I was milking. During mealtimes, I was milking. When I was supposed to be shopping, I was milking. I lost sleep. So much, in fact, that I got tuberculosis and polio. My wife couldn’t stand my obsession with this game. She left me and took the kids. But that couldn’t stop my addiction. I was fired from my job because I was milking instead of working. I stopped paying my bills because I was stroking those udders. I got kicked out of my house. I was now homeless. I turned to hard drugs. I looked on the Milk the Cow leaderboard, and discovered what I looking for. I found cocaine dealers, heroin dealers, even meth dealers. Every penny I made from begging on the streets went towards drugs. It was what I lived for. With one exception…Milk the Cow10/10 would recommend! When sequel?

I downloaded this app 10 minutes ago, before starting milk the cow I had schizophrenia and was hooked on zyn. After playing for a short bit I progressed to milk the cow under 8 seconds. Unfortunately my dependency on calcium filled beverages has also progressed. My parole officer has forbidden me from entering a 50 foot radius of dairy farms because of my complex history of mental health episodes around cattle. My entire family has disowned me and I am now living in a small university in Massachusetts trying to make my way researching dairy harvesting technology. Although I still have schizophrenia, I am no longer addicted to zyn, just heroin, fentanyl, morphine, and meth. I hope they make a sequel, my friends at my side hustle who call themselves “MIT Engineers” disapprove of my calcium filled dream, due to my lactose intolerance

I stumbled across this app recently. Need to play more before I get a real grasp for it. I want to say it’s at least good, but tbh it left me wanting more. As an insignificant background point, I worked as a ranch hand for a little bit. While I appreciate every milk went well with the cow milking app, it doesn’t happen so smooth irl. Sometimes the udder sprays all over than hands and sometimes in the face. A couple occasional mishaps could make the app more unpredictable and that kind of uncertainty could meet some user’s needs for a little something to spice things up.

I found this one day on the App Store and thought it looks funny, so I downloaded it, but now after playing for hours I realize just how masterfully crafted this game is. It isn’t just a funny little game. It is a journey through the life of a humble farmer who every day goes out to milk their cow. They live alone, a sad, lonely life with the only thing to talk to being their animals. Because of how boring their life is, the only thing they do for fun is to see how fast they can milk their cow. Such a beautiful story told with such little words, almost none at all. In fact, the story is so hidden most players would miss it completely on their first play through. I really recommend playing through this game multiple times and getting all the different endings. My favorite ending to get is the Milkiplier ending, where Markiplier shows up and drinks 10 gallons of whole milk, and then 3 containers of egg nog.10/10 game