plants...but not real
Casual
Only for iPhone
Free · Designed for iPhone. Not verified for macOS.
iPhone
Grow a plant. Try not to kill it. It will judge you either way.
Finally. A plant you actually can't kill. (Well. You can. But it's not real, so.)
plants...but not real is a free daily plant care game for people who love the idea of plants but have a complicated history with keeping them alive.
Pick a plant. Name it. Check in every day to water, trim, and weed it. Your plant grows over time — or dies if you forget. No real plants were harmed in the making of this app.
YOUR PLANT HAS OPINIONS
Every plant has a sarcastic personality and something to say about everything you do. Your cactus doesn't need you and wants you to know that. Your monstera is being dramatic again. Your rose expects better. Over 200 unique one-liners across 6 plant types — because your plant should at least be entertaining while it judges you.
REAL WEATHER. REAL CONSEQUENCES.
The app connects to your local weather. Raining outside? Your plant gets watered automatically. Heat wave? You'd better check in. Every day is a little different depending on where you are.
GROW YOUR WHOLE GARDEN
Adopt multiple plants at once. Each has its own personality, growth timer, health bar, and diary. A sunflower grows fast. A cactus takes its sweet time and is smug about it.
FEATURES
• 6 plants — succulent, fern, rose, cactus, monstera, sunflower
• Real weather integration using your location
• Daily streaks and health tracking
• 5 growth stages per plant
• 200+ sarcastic plant one-liners
• Plant diary that logs every interaction
• Daily reminders so your plant can guilt-trip you
• Completely free
For introverts, plant killers, casual gamers, and anyone who just needs something small to take care of.
Ratings & Reviews
- This app hasn’t received enough ratings or reviews to display an overview.
The developer, Kyle Woods, indicated that the app’s privacy practices may include handling of data as described below. For more information, see the developer’s privacy policy .
Data Not Linked to You
The following data may be collected but it is not linked to your identity:
- Location
Accessibility
The developer has not yet indicated which accessibility features this app supports. Learn More
Information
- Seller
- Kyle Woods
- Size
- 17.3 MB
- Category
- Casual
- Compatibility
Requires iOS 15.1 or later.
- iPhone
Requires iOS 15.1 or later. - iPod touch
Requires iOS 15.1 or later. - Mac
Requires macOS 12.0 or later and a Mac with Apple M1 chip or later. - Apple Vision
Requires visionOS 1.0 or later.
- iPhone
- Languages
- English
- Age Rating
4+
- 4+
- Copyright
- © 2026 Kyle Woods